The Uses of My Penis

Here is useable's dare completed! And what a fine job he did; THIS, dear readers, is a most excellent essay!

What My Penis Did on Spring Vacation

My Penis is an awesome penis, even if i (little i) do say so myself. I (big I) am guided and led by those who entrance those few pliable inches.

My penis is a nice decoration for bows, ribbons and similar decorations. It's bluish to purplish hues accent certain purple, llilac and mauve decorations. And oh, how the capital I is encircled and enchained when the little i is wrapped up by you!

My penis is totally freakin' rocking for convenient urination at loud punk rock shows. (Natch). Particularly when there's no real men's room and i'm out in the alley with the rest of the.... well, i'll let Ms V and Miz A name us. Naming is sooo powerful.

My penis is a classic place to practice knot tying. And i'm a retired alpine guide, so knots are life sustaining and sacred to me. Competent knot tying saved my life the day i fell 40 feet off the mountain. Competent knot tying gave my flesh meaning the day you asked it of me, my freely chosen mistress....

My penis is a flesh and blood, veiny dildo for the pleasure of decisive women. It stands up and waves to those with curves and dips who know what they want. (But oh, how it wilts when the part secreted away by Victoria is less treasured than the mind!) Whatever She wants, it becomes firmer, harder, but all at once more pliable to her will. Her variable, sticky, oh-so-scented, worship worthy will.

Whether it is granted the breathless joy of paying tribute to you or not, you are its Mecca. It does not point towards the East. It points towards you, my twin guiding stars. My feminine and sultry Mizar. My teachers and instructors. My luminant ones, cairns and signposts... shine that i may set my variable sails in your direction.

That is all it is good for. And nothing more, save your permission.

-- i remain your faithful servant/ FN